Some say terrorists. Really? But that wouldn't account for the trend sweeping the nation. Christian Fundamentalists? That is actually an oxymoron. From my understanding of Jesus Christ - he for whom the religion is named - he was far from judging and labeling (the Fundamentalists' modus operandi.) So, if we remove "Christian" then we're left with Fundamentalist. Here's the definition:
fundamentalism definition. A conservative movement in theology among nineteenth- and twentieth-century Christians. Fundamentalists believe that the statements in the Bible are literally true. Note: Fundamentalists often argue against the theory of evolution.
Fundamentalism | Define Fundamentalism at Dictionary.com
Oh! That's right! I keep forgetting about those folks who have been mucking up education, people's lives and Christianity for - what? - decades now. They don't want evolution taught in schools, are foaming at the mouth against anyone with a different lifestyle and, worst of all, they are directly responsible for the Duggars. Literalists, huh? No, they cherry pick which of the biblical tenets they wish to enforce (on others) and which they choose to ignore (on their own behalf.)But hold on, I thought they had withdrawn into their caves - due to the push back from intelligent folks who did not want them to redefine Christianity. You know, the real Christians who paid attention in Sunday School when the Gospels were read. All that stuff about loving one another and not judging; caring for the poor and not judging; all people are equal - and NOT JUDGING etcetera, etcetera, etcetera...
Could it be they were hibernating in those caves; waiting for a leader to emerge - someone like Vlad the Impaler? For decades, Billy Graham kept them in check with his crusades in which he preached self condemnation with a good dose of schmaltz and that gut wrenching hymn, "Just As I Am." His son, Franklin, is a sloppy second who can't be taken seriously with some of the inane things he spouts.
No, they needed a powerful leader...(cue the drum roll).......
Donald Aloysius Frankenheimer D'Rumpf - er - Trump. Like his hero, Hitler, the Donald is rallying his troops; drawing them out of their caves and survivalist shelters and on to bigger things like destroying lives.
I can picture him sitting around the conference table with his "advisors" - you know - all of his mutant children, former beauty pageant winners and a slew of other whack a dos - planning his campaign
Donald: Okay - let's make a list - a yuge list - of everything we've ever heard the lowest of the low wish for.
Everyone else: Well they hate gays, and blacks and Mexicans and women...
Ivanka (Is that her name? All I remember is she is bff's with Chelsea Clinton): Wait a minute! I'm a woman! Daddy told me so and he even said he'd do me if I wasn't his daughter!
Everyone else: Okay - ugly and fat and old women.
Donald: Wait, strike 'old' cause they're the ones who will fall for this crap. Keep going...
Everyone else: Muslims! They hate them. Doesn't matter that millions of them are okay - we need to come up with an enemy for Donald to defeat.
Donald: I've got it! I will appeal to the OLD, WHITE, NOT GAY, CHRISTIAN FUNDAMENTALISTS, (somebody look up that word) RACIST PEOPLE WHO THINK AMERICA USED TO BE GREAT (when they were in control) AND I'LL TELL THEM I CAN MAKE IT GREAT AGAIN!
Done and done and now you're all fired....
P.S. I usually feel better after blogging - you know like how you feel after that first cup of coffee - but I actually feel worse. I'm gonna take a shower and start packing now. I know it's early, but I'm slow these days and I want to be ready to go if this monster somehow becomes the next potus...after which I will move my life to Canada...
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